Adopting a Sibling Group
Keeping siblings together is always very important for Kids First International as these children have lost so much in their life already; keeping siblings together and having the opportunity to be there for each other is crucial.
When families adopt multiple sibling groups, it is very important to understand the background of medical, emotional, and neurological histories of each child individually. It is important to understand how the siblings interact with each other and their peers. Families should understand that each child will require personal attention, individual approach, and will have their unique set of gifts and challenges.
Our agency asks about developmental milestones, any available paperwork on the relinquishment of parental rights if it exists, as much information as possible about the biological family, and how the children ended up in the orphanage system. As an agency, we try to understand the sibling dynamics, individual personalities, individual strong and weak areas of development, communication skills, previous medical histories, and the children’s reactions to the world when things become hard or stressful.
We also ask if the siblings know each other; quite often due to age differences and orphanage structures, children do not know each other much at all. We also deal with situations where the children grow up together and the older sibling feels in charge of the younger siblings. There are many scenarios in which siblings grow up together, and the older sibling has great influence on the younger siblings as well as a sense of responsibility. This can become difficult for adoptive parents to parent initially. We believe in preparation, education, and consulting with adoption specialists such as physicians who specialize in adoption medicine. We believe in evaluation of each child before and after they come home.
At Kids First International, we are very intentional with the work we do. We always want to learn about you family composition, obligations in life, personalities of the other children you are parenting, and how it would all fit together in order to guide you appropriately.
Sometimes families contact us and say that they hosted one older child but want to adopt three other siblings as well, and they do not have information about the siblings. It is wonderful to feel a good feeling about a child, but it is important that families do not only base adoption on their love and commitment but try to receive as much information as possible on all the children.
At Kids First International, we try to gain every piece of information we could possibly receive by asking questions again and again. We provide 100% of all information we are able to obtain to the adoptive parents.
Adopting a sibling group can be very rewarding, and at the same time, very stressful especially at the beginning, but the best things in life do not come easy. It is important that our adoptive parents have lower expectations verses high expectations, and hopefully when they bring their children home, they will feel that they were adequately prepared. We hope that working hard to get as many questions answered as possible and working closely with adoptive parents will prepare them.
Adoption is a huge decision in life, and we want to ensure that adoptive families see the importance of this decision. A lot of adoptive parents go on websites and see pictures of different children who need homes. Parents start the process of adoption by falling in love with the faces of the children on the website, which is easy to do; however, parents do not pay as much attention to the history of the children. Our belief is to start from understanding the history of the children and what parents can and cannot handle. It is important not to create a feeling of responsibility for the child before parents even start to review the medical history.
There are so many incredible kids in this world, and many of them need homes, families, and permanency. However, if a family is not equipped to provide stability and care while understanding the needs of the children who are waiting to be adopted internationally, it can become very challenging. When people are adopting sibling groups, most countries at this time are governed by Hague regulations. It is important to understand Hague regulations when adopting internationally. This agency works in countries where we feel Hague principles are observed with honesty, transparency, and true advocacy for the wellbeing of each child.
If a family calls us wanting to adopt a specific child that we are advocating for, the countries we work with allow up to 6 months for families to get their home study approval and USCIS approval to adopt that child. Families will need to provide commitment documents to the ministry. By doing this, the ministry will hold the referral under the family’s name to allow them an extra 6 months to complete the necessary paperwork to be in a position to adopt the child.
When families are considering adoption, this agency is committed to walk them through every stage of the process. We provide guidance on the application, collecting documents, getting all the proper information from our coordinators, helping with arrangements in country, taking them through every step of the process.
If you want to schedule an adoption coaching meeting, below is a link to schedule time for any questions you may have.